Football Is Not Gay

Because it's only gay if balls touch and in football there is only one ball. Therefore football can never be gay, even with some seriously eyebrow raising shenanigans like those going on here...

Feeling rough? Headache, indigestion, itchy, flaky scalp? Sore throat, feminine itching, menstrual cramps? Head lice? Irritated gums? Overactive bladder? Don’t worry, I’m there is something you can buy that will sooth those pains.

When it comes to drinking you should always remember to only pass out in your own bed, with none of your friends in the house so they can't tape you to the walls and spray you in urine or paint you the colors of unicorn sh#t.

Taking cat videos to a whole new level, enjoy the spectacle of cats puking up their guts to the sound of techno music—and then wonder what the hell you're doing with your life.

I've watched this about 10 times now and I'm still highly impressed. The quick thinking, the delivery and then the claim that he had nothing to do with it. Oh and the result. All first class....Meet my new hero!

If a huge crane collapses and there's a camera to film it, does it make a for awesome footage & horrendous sounds? Yeah, it does.

A wise man once said; The last thing you want after a cucumber sammich is someone else's pubes in your teeth. Durex take their advertising to bold and disgusting new places in an effort to get them banned from the television.

Well, I guess technically they're not dancing to techno, they're in the throws of a violent upchuck reflex as their bodies try to expel errant hairballs, but still, it's better than my dancing...

When Samuel L Jackson tells you that it's over and he's never going back out with you, you can take that as gospel. He's not a man who minces his words. That said I think I prefer Taylor Swift's vocals...

No matter how much your job sucks there's always someone out there who's got it worse than you. Take this guy for instance. He has to massage bikini models all day AND they expect him to come in and work weekends too! Poor guy.

I want my money back; that horse in the front took a dive and lost the race! Luckily, both the horses and the jockeys came away with only minor injuries.